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Posts tagged "children of alcoholic parents"

congrats my parents can be drunk for two weeks straight

feel like this year of school is going to ten times worse…my moms a psychopath when shes drunk and has to wake up at 5 30 in the morning to get us up/i have to wake her up and she breaks things and yells at me and refuses to take me to school

aka thank you dad for buying me a car even though you have aspergers and laugh at me when i tell you anything and think i make things up in my head aka i make up my allergies to cats in my head okay and its my fault my mom and stepdad used my child support to pay the bills and buy alcohol and drugs, why you hold that against ME i dont know…? 

ps im having a horrible summer, my “friends” are being asses, my depression and anxiety levels are extremely high, my parents are drunk every night, im sick of sitting in this hot room all day/night, im turning into an old woman making crafts, schools about to start aka back to psychotic mom, and hating holidays, and people complaining about how bad their parents are when they (have jobs, go to their jobs, still married, care about where you are/what you’re doing, have rules, give you a curfew, want to spend time with you, talk to you, listen to you, dont get drunk after you try and have a serious conversation with you, or laugh and scoff at everything you say and consistently call you a liar, and that you make up everything, and that they don’t drink and they’re acting “weird/drunk” because of you, you make them that way.) don’t treat you bad at all, but treat you like a good parent should.

sometimes i just want to drive my car into the river

i just wish someone would believe me or care or anything went to therapy when i was 13-14, my mom lied and said she’d have 1-3 drinks once a week.  they never believed anything i said and told me i had teen angst, if it was teen angst why would i still be complaining about the same thing after 5 years?

Adult children of alcoholics may:

  • Have to Guess What Normal Is
    Because they did not have a example to follow from their childhood and never experienced “normal” family relationships, adult children of alcoholics and addicts may have to guess at what it means to be normal. They sometimes can’t tell good role models from bad ones. Some are not comfortable around family because they don’t know what to do or how to react.

  • Judge Themselves Without Mercy
    Many adult children of alcoholics or addicts find it difficult to give themselves a break. They do not feel adequate, and feel that they are never good enough. They may have little self-worth and low self-esteem and can develop deep feelings of inadequacy.

  • Take Themselves Too Seriously
    Because they judge themselves too harshly, some adult children of alcoholics may take themselves very seriously. They can become depressed or anxious because they have never learned how to lighten up on themselves. They can get very angry with themselves when they make a mistake.

  • Have Difficulty Having Fun
    Many adult children of alcoholics find it difficult to let themselves have fun. Perhaps because they witnessed so many holidays, vacations and other family events sabotaged by the alcoholic parent, they do not expect good things to ever happen to them.

  • Have Difficulty With Intimate Relationships
    In order to have an intimate relationship, one must be willing to look to another person for interdependence, emotional attachment, or fulfillment of your needs. Because of trust issues or lack of self-esteem, adult children of addicts may not be able to let themselves do that. They don’t allow themselves to get close to others.

  • Have Trust Issues
    After growing up in an atmosphere where denial, lying and keeping secrets was the norm, adult children of alcoholics can develop serious trust problems. All the broken promises of the past tell them that trusting someone will backfire on them in the future.

  • Become Terrified of Abandonment
    Because their alcoholic parent was emotionally unavailable or perhaps physically not around, adult children of alcoholics or addicts can develop an absolute fear of being abandoned. As a consequence, they can find themselves holding on to relationships they should end just because they don’t want to be alone.

  • Become Frightened of Angry People
    If their alcoholic parent was mean or abusive when they were drunk, adult children can grow up with a fear of all angry people. They may spend their lives avoiding conflict or confrontation of any kind, thinking it could turn violent.

  • Constantly Seek Approval
    Because they constantly judge themselves too harshly, many adult children of alcoholicsare constantly seeking approval from others. The can become people-pleasers who are crushed if someone is not happy with them. They can absolutely fear criticism.

  • Feel They Are Different
    Many children who grow up with an addicted parent find themselves thinking they are different from other people and not good enough. Consequently, they avoid social situations and have difficulty making friends. They can tend to isolate themselves as a result.

  • Can Become Super Responsible
    Perhaps to avoid criticism or the anger of their alcoholic parent, many children from alcoholic homes become super responsible or perfectionists. They can become overachievers or workaholics. On the other hand, they can also go in the opposite direction, becoming very irresponsible members of society.

annoyed that i have every one of these traits

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